SensoryMetrics

I know this may be a shock to you, so I hope that you are sitting down. This past weekend we turned our clocks back, so now it’s dark when we get home. However, you should cheer up since this Sunday is November 11th, Remembrance day, so what does it all mean? Well, it means that on the following Monday, Government employees will begin their Christmas shopping spree. Unable to find what they need at the mall, the frantic shopping race and accompanied madness will last for another 6 weeks. Just in time for post Christmas shopping to start. If you’re ready to pass on the mall shopping eXperience, then here are some mall-less alternative gifts to consider:

1. Buy them an Oxfam goat. An oldie but a goody. It’s my second favourite gift to receive right after dog biscuits.
2. Buy them a subscription to Facebook Deluxe. This nifty upgrade not only gives you access to the VIP applications, but lets you turn off ads (wacky option: custom deluxe video ads on your page.)
3. Bake them a cake. Better yet, try one of these online recipes.
4. Buy them an iPod touch. Really, you can’t go wrong with this gift, plus you can buy it online and have it shipped to your house, only it’ll arrive via FedEX so you’ll have to drive out to the airport to pick it up.
5. Give them your old pc (since we’re all getting new iMacs this year). Make sure to tell them how much you originally paid for it, if possible show them the original receipt, we know you’ve long since lost the manual.
6. Create a Wordpress blog / fan site for them. Be sure to include a bunch of embarrassing photos and if possible post a viral YouTube video for good measure.
7. Send them a bunch of those ‘e-cards‘ you know, just like all those spam emails we’ve been ignoring all year.
8. Send them a link to this post and comment below with what you really want for Christmas. Be sure to write it out with the CAPS ON. If you can’t give, you can at least receive. Isn’t that one of the main tenets of Kabbalah?

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